CHANGING ROOMS

To my regular readers, please except not my but Mama J’s most humble apologises for her lack of editorial input last week. She is on her hands and knees as my paws tap frantically along the keyboard, begging you for forgiveness for her being a total no show blogging wise. If I went totally freelance I would cause an international incident bark/typing wise so I need Mama J’s steady hand on the word guidance front.
   Now for the reason why she wasn’t available. Was she out making a difference in society? Helping her friends perhaps? Caring for animals that weren’t even me? Well, that last one better not be true otherwise we’ll be having stern words once this is pawed. No, Mama J was letting her creative juices flow in her bedroom. Please Mama J will you stop trying to conjure up images of Idris Elba naked in your bedroom! Sorry love but unless this blog becomes world famous it really isn’t going to happen… Oh bugger she’s getting a bit teary now, I better stop with my extremely harsh impression of Strictly Come Dancing Judge Craig Revel Horwood and tell her she’s fab-u-lous!

Mama J decided the other Monday night, right in the middle of Coronation Street that she fancied a change of look. This was bedroom wise and not hair cut wise, which was getting to be a standard occurrence most times she was booked in for a trim, until she decided that long flowing locks were the order of the hairdressing day. So she set about single handedly saving the interior design world one quilt cover, towel set, picture print and chair at a time! Now Mama J had a bedroom that made Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat look positively dull. Changing Room’s Designer Laurence Llewelyn Bowen would’ve being so proud as there was a manically coloured chair that matched or well really didn’t, her even more manically coloured bedspreads. Yes, bedspreads really is what the old girl calls them, like something out the 1950s. Mama J they are duvet covers, please will you just get with the times. Anyway you can see why I didn’t want to spend the full night in there and retreated to Granny and Grandpa’s room. It was like sleeping in Austin Powers groovy baby boudoir.
   She then started looking for inspiration, we could all do with a bit of that with Mama J’s high fluting ideas and found it on Pinterest, which became her go to creative ideas guru. It was decided that her room was going to be calming shades of grey and yellow. Then her mission which she very much did choose to except was to find a grey chair, which she managed to source on Dunelm’s website. After choosing an absolute beauty of a chair and ordering it and then finding some bedspreads sorry duvet sets to blend her grey and yellow vision, Mama J and Granny set off in search of towels, so there was a greater flow of continuity into her en-suite.
   She found two sets of towels, one grey and one yellow and began wandering around the Dunelm store to see what pictures they had in stock. En-route Mama J and Granny had to walk through the chair department and spotted a beautiful grey chair that wasn’t on their website but was actually on sale in store.
Mama J’s eyes welled up, think Bambi when his mother was killed but not quite as drastic of course, as she sat in this perfectly stuffed seat. Her bum had never felt such cushioning she was exclaiming to Granny as she sat and looked to the skies, well the shops ceiling for divine intervention or a customer services number to cancel her existing order. Mama J initially walked away from the chair and round to the picture department but was so distracted that she couldn’t concentrate on the array of wonderful prints that were on display. As she went back to have another look at the chair, she said to Granny that she would have to take a cushion and turn it into a feudal stick Jet from Gladiator’s style should anyone dare to try and purchase the gorgeous grey chair. The chair was still there as Mama J glared at anyone who passed it and looked in its direction. She made an extremely speedy purchase and then made a very simple telephone call to cancel her previous Dunelm order. The world of Mama J was an ecstatically happy place, as has been her bottom sat on its new throne.

Lastly she needed to find some pictures for her bathroom area, as she felt multicoloured cars weren’t really a racing vision in her mind anymore. At first she was going to go with inspirational quotes such as lines from the movie Rocky. However starting her morning with a wee and the words, “The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place…” Wasn’t really the way to go. Although I do know this speech revs itself up to be very motivational towards the end of the quote. Also she didn’t go with an Audrey Hepburn quote, as she thought that when she entered her bathroom in the morning with her hair all dishevelled, she didn’t feel she could ever pull off the grace and beauty that Audrey possessed. Now come on Mama J, you are awesome too!
   It was decided that she would purchase some extremely quirky dog photographs that even I couldn’t have pulled off modelling wise.
They really finish off the area perfectly as did repainting her barometer from turquoise to a dark grey. I do question her ever getting into an eBay bidding war (yes it really did happen) over her barometer, as Mama J can just open her curtains and have a peep out of the window to see what the weather is doing but creatively it does look quite cool and stop her from getting down and groovy to the not so trendy national shipping forecasts just yet. That Grandma move could be coming anytime soon from her though!


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