Last week was a strange old week for a little Yorkshire Terrier like me, with my family coming and going at all times of the day and evening. I restrained myself from saying night there as there were no midnight/moonlight flits (don’t worry they haven’t done any bank jobs that they are on the run for… to my greatest knowledge anyway) but only just on that score.
Great Granny BB’s health is deteriorating, therefore my Granny is having to spend more and more time at her house looking after her. For a creature of pure and unadulterated habit such as myself this was too much to bare as I do love my usual evening routine.
Mama J and I would normally sit down after tea around 7.00pm. I lay across her lap and we watch Emmerdale until Granny and Grandpa (sorry Mrs Patmore and Carson) come in after washing the dishes.They have invented a machine to take care of that task, do you think I should tell them? They bring wine, rum sometimes gin and tonic and the odd beer in with them and then we all watch TV together. I move from Mama J’s lap onto my cushion (oh yes I have my very own padding for my bum and tum) where I stay until it is time to go out for my bedtime wee.
I always have my dinner (oh I love that word when it is ushered from my Granny’s lips along with the words do you want some) at 6.00pm but my family have been having their’s around the same time as mine. Great for my belly as Grandpa always gives me tit bits and earlier tit bits than usual is always a huge bonus.
Mama J and I therefore have been settling down with an evening milkshake (for Mama J, I just get exotic filtered tap water to sup on) and Hollyoaks for company on the television while Granny and occasionally Grandpa have been going over to make sure Great Granny BB is comfortably settled in bed.
Tuesday evening was particularly odd as Grandpa came home but Granny decided to stay the night with Great Granny as she was so bad that evening that she didn’t want to leave her. To me Granny became The Scarlet Pimpernel. I seek her here, I seek her there but I couldn’t find her anywhere!
I looked out the living room window, I looked in the hallway and when I went to bed I looked around the rooms upstairs too. Grandpa let me out for my nightly toilet activities, that’s normally a Granny job and then he started running a bath, another Granny job. I sat on the landing looking out the skylight, “Granny, Granny wherefore art though Granny?” Oh her absence was turning me all Shakespearian. I’ll be joining a theatre group if Granny keeps up this disappearing act and a travelling one at that. Now back to my lines! Grandpa got into bed and I joined him just incase Granny had magically reappeared in a puff of smoke, oh we are onto pantomime now. What theatrical training I’m getting here? Now before you ask no she wasn’t behind me.
The next day Mama J and Grandpa popped Mama J’s car to the garage for its annual service and MOT test and then I was put out of my misery and taken to Great Granny BB’s where to my utter delight I was reunited with my Granny. How I licked her face and gave her big cuddles!
I mentioned last week that Mama J was anticipating the return of the hit BBC medical drama Casualty after a four week Olympic hiatus. Well, Mama J was going to record it and watch The X Factor (what dilemmas these TV Executives cause in our house) and keep abreast of Holby City’s A&E department on Twitter. Twenty-seven minutes before transmission her face began contorting. Was she doing her facial exercises? Go on Mama J I believe it goes like this, “EEE. AAAAHH. OOOO!” That’s better you now look twelve years old again. No, these were signs of anxiety and worry as to what might unfold in the fictional (yes fictional someone please tell Mama J it’s not real) hospital.
At 7.58pm Mama J changed her mind and decided she couldn’t wait another almost twenty-four hours to find out her favourite characters fate. She decided to watch Casualty! Mama J’s face was a dramatic picture within itself and her decision to watch Casualty caused Granny to get a fit of giggles at the anxious looks on display in our living room and my paw to get slight pangs of pain every time she began squeezing it at a dramatic moment. Every five-seconds of the feature length episode to be precise (it was a long hour and forty minutes) when she thought a character or two were in mortal peril.
I’m going to embarrass Mama J here as I found an example of her face in full fear flow that I wish to share with you all. This is to show you full extent of what she was like, however this was taken when Mama J used to go horse riding and Seamus the horse took off into canter mode. Grandpa was the shocked/amused one snapping this photograph when Mama J invited him to watch one of her lessons. Look at the fear and times it by one thousand and that is the image we faced last Saturday evening.
Casualty character’s Connie and especially daughter Grace aren’t out of the woods yet and the story and probably Mama J’s facial antics continue in tomorrow evening’s episode of Holby City. Wish me, my left paw and Mama J’s blood pressure luck please!